A Rant within a Rave or however you look at it.

My entire life, I've always been the little girl who wanted to be a *STAR-ah*. I went to The Whitney E. Houston Academy of Creative and Performing Arts (look it up! lol East Orange, New Jersey- formerly known as Franklin School), on and off from kindergarten to 8th grade. I was ALWAYS in Drama Club and the Imani Choir... BOTH with Ms. Williams. I absolutely LOVED IT. in my middle school years, Dance attracted me more than Choir, so when it was time to audition, I auditioned in dance and Drama.

High Shool years didn't allow for that formal training i recieved at Houston Academy because my grandparents were so addament about me not traveling across town to the "ghetto" part of East Orange (ALL of EO is "hood", so... it really didnt matter) to attend the Cicely Tyson School of Creative and Perfoming Arts (formerly, VLD). Oh well. I ended up at East Orange Campus High School and I wouldnt trade that any day to go to VLD. In my attempts to continue acting and dancing, I joined the Marching Band, Cheerleading Squad, and Indoor Winter Guard. OH.EMM.GEEE. *sidebar* I believe I had thee most PERFECT high school experience ever!

*anyways* I was ALWAYS in front of a crowd. If i wasnt, i was practicing to be in front of a crowd. At LEAST once a week i was doin my thang for people to see. on stage in front of an audience was where i needed to be for the rest of my life. I was natural at performing AND entertaining. (yes. there is a difference. a BIG difference). I took all that Energy.Passion.Motivation. i had, bottled it up and let it spew all over my college applications. I applied to one of the best Conservatory schools in the NATION (University of Cincinnati) and I got in!! whoop whoop!! lol i went, i loved it but my interest got detered some how, some way.

Here I am in this new school that isnt Cincinnati, and I want to be.....guess...

A DOCTOR!!

WTF?!?!

YES. i want to be a doctor. an Obtetrician/ Gynecologist to be specific. now, i know you prolly askin "medicine?? where the fuck did that come from??" cuz im askin myself the same exact thing. since i was in Houston Academy, I have been watching the Discovery HEALTH Channel. I've always been into the show "Birth Day", and now more recently, "Deliver Me". I've never been a "science/ math person". I was always into language arts, the Arts, and gym. lol While i have never been interested by science and saw it as a chore, I had/ have a knack for for it. Biology is really easy for me. more so than it was for my "higher GPA" peers. Chemistry...not so much. But, I understand its concepts. putting it into work is another story.

But yeah. This summer, my BFFOAT (Best friend forever of all time), was studying for the MCAT (she's pre-Med) and I decided to look over her notes she left in my car one day... BOY! I'LL TELL YA! that physics shit is gonna hurt the mess outta my ego. lol but i honestly feel like i can do this. like FOR REAL! and I want to do it...

But here's the kicker...

I also want to persue a career in the Entertainment industry- of course. doing what?? IDK. but i reeeaaaaallllyyyy want to. I am thinkin of changin my minor from Communication Studies to Marketing (or double minor... can i actually do THAT??) so I can get into Advertising and Promotions. <

Heres my thing... how can a person be so passionate about one thing, be intrigued by another, and want to do something TOTALLY out of their element?? Im confusin myself here! some may see that as being well rounded or whatever, and thats all good but omg. i just know i need to make a decision soon, cuz if not, Im screwed. lol

>Smoochez<